Note to self:no free handing the balls
Okay, last night I decided it was warm enough to shave my head and consequently to shave my balls at the same time. So I went to wally world and decided to get myself two (count them 2) electric razors, one for my head and one for the pubes. What, who shaves their stache with their pube razor that’s just gross.
My comedy of errors began there:first not paying attention I bought 2 battery powered personal grooming devices, a Wahl and a Remington(links to be added later). I don’t mind one being battery powered hell the pubes one there’s not that much space or hair down there so batteries won’t kill me. For my head and face though I figure that usually takes me a few passes, when I’m going for the well groomer look it tends to happen every 3 or 4 days. For that I want a rechargeable, yes sometimes I’ll feel kind of scoundrelish and allow the beard to grow long, or have hair running along the jaw line that still requires maintenance. You do it right you can maintain that rugged 5 o’clock shadow for months. So yeah I had the wrong thing granted the 13 dollar pricetag was nice but the price in batteries over time would eat up the cost difference. So I went back and exchanged the remington for a norelco and some batteries. I charge up the norelco let it go for about an hour, them take it into the bathroom and get rid of the hair on my head, easy peasy lemon squeezy.
Now comes the fun part USUALLY when I trim my pubes its with a pair of scissors or else the rear precision trimmer of those spiral electric razors. They don’t knick a as bad, and its easy to free hand with it. Yeah I tried that with the Wahl, the first guard I tried appeared to be ineffective so I took the guard off. Now the top where I could easily see was a piece of cake, then it was time to lift up the penis and get the part right under my balls. I thought things were okay it buzzed a few times, but hey I buzz my head all the time no major damage.
Yeaaaaaaah see here is where I find out something new: the skin on your balls may LOOK as tough as your normal skin but it seems its a lot softer. So those couple of buzzes were actually nicks, now like most shallow cuts the bleeding looked far worse than the actual damage that had been sustained. So I dabbed them with a towel, got a paper towel and soaked it in peroxide and sat it between my dick and balls to avoid infection(yeah that is not a visit I wanna have “doc my balls are infected”) and I cleaned up some of the rest of the remaining hair(with the guard attached, cause damn I Freddy Kruegered my own balls) and went to sleep.
So in the future Wahl clippers ain no bitch, they may be battery operated, but them muffukas are sharp as hell. Use the guard trust me, your genitalia will thank you for it