When I get my head on straight I'll tell ya

It’s about to be a month since Civil War

So I think I will do the SPOILER review for Monday or Tuesday. X-men:Apocalypse has also dropped and while I did the review it’s not really blazing up the box office unlike Fox’s OTHER 2016 entry, you know the one they were hands off with because the fans drug them to it and they thought “Pffft what do fans know about a good movie, fuck them. Fantastic 4 and X-men will show them what is good” and while I think X-men will get some legs later I will be surprised if it gets anywhere near 600 million. 250 domestic will probably be its top out. I mean, I saw it in a packed theater but unlike Deadpool where everyone seemed to be not only enthused but orgasmic the reaction while positive was subdued.

You can’t just go with flashy special effects, unbalanced action, and “the name on the jersey” anymore. People actually want you to show them that you not only READ the material you are referencing but that you understand it and that you are doing you best to adapt it within YOUR CHARACTER RIGHTS, not just saying “hey these are the characters you want right, so come give us money for this movie.” Deadpool was a home run, hell a 2 run home run and Civil War was a Grand Slam, for all the shit they had to change because they didn’t have the rights Civil War felt like everything you didn’t know you wanted.  Let me be clear, X-men Apocalypse is Brian Singers BEST X-MEN MOVIE to date, and it’s too little too late. 

The things I am noticing is that Marvel is changing the rules on adaptations. The things they have done well, have been done MOMENTOUSLY well. The Netflix series, Ant-man, Guardians of the Galaxy, Civil War, Age of Ultron(and Civil War is a better Avengers movie than Ultron) they figure out what made these characters and stories important to us and found a way to give it to us even though they were missing KEY parts of each and every storyline or group. Marvel comics is not only a melting pot but it’s almost a campus. If you think about how often the heroes trip over each other or each others villains you will realize that for Marvel to have been this successful with ANY story in a movie they had to find a way to make it seem less blatant that someone was missing. In the first Avengers movie Spider-man, Daredevil, Luke Cage, The Fantastic Four, and PROBABLY a few X-men would have shown up just to help with the reduction of collateral damage. J. Jonah Jameson would have had his face plaster somewhere screaming about why the military and “Our Heroes” weren’t doing a better job protecting the populace as well as blaming Spider-man for it.

At the time, Marvel had the rights to none of that as we all know Spider-man is in Civil War a deal that MUST have been in the works for a while(since a line slipped through in Ant-man which came out in 2015 and he is in a Captain America movie in 2016) and when you see what Marvel does with the flagship(and yes Spider-man is Marvel’s Mickey Mouse) in what has to be the greatest 15 minutes of scene stealing ever(which technically is all Web Head ever does) the amount of noise that will be made to try to convince studios to give the rights back is about to be deafening. Especially when it seems that movies made by Marvel directors are made by fans not just guys trying to “put their name on it.” Maybe that’s the beauty of a Kevin Feige, he is a fan, he shows up at the cons to hear what fans want, and then he goes out there and gives us extra cherries and whipped cream because Marvel that’s why. I am going to have to avoid saying that Marvel Stole the script for Batman v Superman, laughed hysterically and did it better, but I’ll be damned if every note that B v S missed wasn’t hit with Perfect Pitch in Civil War. That Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy will be the obscure hit that Suicide Squad is based on NOT because they are carbon copies of each other, they aren’t Marvel’s “suicide squad” are known as the Thunderbolts. A bunch of ex cons from the Raft who use their super powers for good in order to get privileges or reduced sentences, which by the way IF at some point in time with the apparent failure of the latest X-men movie to gain traction Fox decides to make a deal similar to Sony’s I want to see made.

The sad thing for Warner Bros DC is that they had a head start, Warner Bros has owned the rights to ALL of DC’s characters since sometimes around the first Batman movie, not Begins I mean the Micheal Keaton Batman. And yet for whatever reason they never decided to create a shared universe. Time Warner/Warner Bros/WB/The CW has had the ability to do the one thing Marvel comics has been working its way around(and successfully at that) for 26 years and yet are being constantly handed their hat in this comic movie thing. There are some who are wondering if Super Hero FATIGUE is setting in, and my answer to that is NO. What is setting in, is a refusal to accept the old excuse of “it can’t be done, it won’t be profitable, nobody wants to see or accept a true to the comics adaptation.” When the opposite is true, I honestly think that if instead of just slamming Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman in a movie DC comics had found a way to BLEND those stories together it would have been a critical success. Civil War passed BvS in less than a month, it’s June 5th. Batman v Superman in 2 months hasn’t climbed over 350 million Civil war has already knocked off Deadpool with 370. X-men is under-performing, not because Hugh Jackman isn’t in a title role, but because when you look over the landscape of the last few years you see that “truer to the comics” stories are what people want to see. The one Iron Man movie that was not well received was IM3, why because we were promised the Mandarin and we got some old drunk actor. Prior to Civil War Winter Soldier was King of the Solo Movies, why because it had a COMPELLING BELIEVABLE true to the comic’s story involved Cap, Bucky, Black Widow, and Shield.

Seriously, all that inside baseball went well because even though (at the time) you couldn’t implicate Bucky in the death of say “the Parker’s” or talk about cap having run in’s with say Doctor Doom for Nick Fury to find out secrets, or rescue operatives, or even run into a mutual villain because honestly who wants to be a cap villain. You saw Batroc try his hand at taking on the shield and how well did that go, fleet of foot my ass. And even their semi resolve at the end of Civil War was well received, why? Because it gave you a reason to invest in the story, you understood it wasn’t just a money grabbing cop-out that it probably would be the best way for all parties involved because “nobody likes being brainwashed, mind wiped, or psychically reprogrammed” don’t believe me just ask Wolverine.

Anyway this went longer than I expected, feel free to add your comments. If you disagree please give me your reasons, including if you think BvS was a wonderful movie we can debate it down below, I won’t be evil about it. If you can’t stand Deadpool, hey comments are open I mean it. I don’t mind having conversations and if sometimes I come off a little condescending I apologize, I’m not laughing at you I’m enjoying the difference of opinion.


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