When I get my head on straight I'll tell ya

If the Petty got their wish

There has been a post going around social media that on January 18th or 19th President Barack H Obama the 44th President of the United States should resign and allow Joseph Biden to become the 45th President. Thus forcing the Trump camp to have to rush and have all of their flyers, banners, and buttons redone. And while this is quite awesome, folks haven’t really thought this through, so I am going to add my little twist onto it.

Because if we are going to get Crazy Uncle Joe as president for 24 to 48 hours, it’s gonna be a big fucking deal, with LOTS of consequences. Consequences that will be such high drama and tomfoolery that we should really give them their just due.

If President Obama Steps down before Trump is inaugurated, that means he avoids a limo and helicopter ride with the orange asshole(score one for Obama), but in the same breath it means that Joe “worlds number one best friend” Biden as the ACTING president has to. Think about this ladies and gentleman, Joe Biden, in a car, and an Airplane with Donald Trump and he’s the President until he gets off that damn helicopter. Can we get an executive order to remove that hair? Can we get an executive order that Spray tanner is banned on the inaugural stage(Trump can’t remove said order until he is sworn in).

It also means that anytime we see Joe Biden they have to play hail to the Chief(though, cause it’s killer Joe I think he should make it an executive order that you have to play “Down with the King” when he steps out). We get a Presidential Portrait of Joe Biden, AND a Wax statue(hopefully wearing his aviators). We get a President who is with his second wife because of a tragic accident, not a tragic inability to keep it in his fucking pants. President Joe can spend his time as president calling press conferences JUST to fuck with the Petulant Elect. I mean we all know Joe tells it like it is, why not let him give us a State of the “I can’t believe we are about to have this asshole cohabitating between the white house and his gold-plated New York Tower” one every 2 hours. The retaliatory tweet storm alone would be hilarious…

What about all the dollars we would wast… I believe most Americans would find it an AWESOME use of their tax dollars to have Joe Biden added to the presidential rolls. As well as piss off Trump, we’d also have a president who is an Eagles fan(hey this is my fantasy), could tell Rudy Giuliani to give Gary Oldman his Bram Stokers Dracula look back, and could tell us stories of all the time he has annoyed the hell out of Mitch McConnell.   It would also even the scales for presidents this century(2 democrat, 2 republican).

Trump would have to hear stories about the PREVIOUS 70 year old president having better more natural looking hair than him. As well as a more accomplished wife, which would burn him up seeing as he is about as loyal as a wind sock. Technically President Joe Biden could also make a few nominations, just to force Mitch McConnell and crew just to hold press conferences complaining about it, AGAIN. To which he can come back and say “Dang Mitch you haven’t wanted to play ball TWO Presidents in a row,” with a wry smile. It would also force Mitch McConnell to hold a press conference explaining how disappointed he is in the act of the previous president all while then trying to fix his face to say glowing things about Joe Biden,who would then light into him for going after Obama.

Joe Biden could walk around for a day with the Secret Service code name “Joe Cool” or Wingman. He would also have presidential benefits for the rest of his life. Joe Biden would get a Presidential Library, Saturday Night Live could then have their Biden impersonator come back weekly to harass Alec Baldwin, all while Baldwin tries to Call Obama to ask him to call off Joe(not gonna happen), only to find his number has been blocked. We’d have a president who would drop a couple of F bombs, because after this election we need to have some presidential F bombs.

You have any ideas drop them in the comments

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s