When I get my head on straight I'll tell ya

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I’m curious, is The Hangover to some new classic?


Every once in a while I look through my stats and the most looked at post is the review for “the Hangover 2”, now it may be the provocative title “it’s called Bangkok not Bangcunt Honey” which is a hilarious one liner from the movie. I forget the character’s name but he’s the ACTOR who is playing a Dentist(not the Dentist Turned actor) who finds out he enjoyed ALL that Thailand had to offer in evening fun.

Sometimes when I do a review if a line sticks out to me or a description I use it as the title. Since “the Hangover” is a series of movies dealing with the aftermath of having too much fun with your friends during a night out. All fiction supposedly but extremely hilarious, plus you get Mike Tyson punching somebody. Now why did I post the movie (more…)

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Hey what do you know, little to no spam


Yes, it has been another writing hiatus. No I don’t know why. I just get like that sometimes and NO it isn’t tied to my beloved eagles hovering around the .500 mark. As one of my favorite Christmas presents says Philadelphia WORLD Champions. I don’t care we still the champs. If I get in a rut I get in a rut, time constraints, ideas flittering out, and the craziness that is the world in 2018 really didn’t inspire much key tapping. I mainly came over here to look for spam and I didn’t really see any. So hey thanks all for not junking up my blog

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Enjoy your holidays and I don’t know what I will do between now in the new year besides game. If you want to see me stream (on my Xbox, haven’t bought Spider-man yet so the PS4 is DUUUS TAAAAAAAAY) Twitch and Mixer. I have added a few more videos to my YouTube channel but nowhere near enough, I need to be more diligent about going back and capturing footage if I recorded or bookmarked it. And I also need to start recording Battlefield footage(which I have yet to do) the other nights stream especially) to all Christmas newbs it ain personal, we ALL have to take our licks when we start out in the game. Don’t rage get better and get us back. As you can see I am getting a LITTLE BETTER at adding in some of my internal links. SOME not all.


Was going to write on the DEBACLE that is the new NFL Anthem policy here


But after I got a good head of steam going, I realized I didn’t need to curse to say what I was thinking(So I moved it to Blogger), and it’s pronounced Deb Ah Cul, because if the word means DISASTER why are we pronouncing it correctly. I think the word should live up to it’s name. Personally, I think they are IDIOTS seriously you are going to give people who do NOTHING but train and hit up Social Media alone time for the protests that can be cued up for while the game is happening. Yeah BRILLIANT.

This reactionary ass move is on some “Who’s that peepin in my Window” type shit. It’s too damn late, folks already in the window if you AIN close the shades they den seen it all. If you shades are closed well, you got a chance. It’s like they have let a certain idiot get their minds all gassed up and they pockets all fucked up. NOT that I am going to stop watching, I will say that now(though the new kick off rule is making me wonder how much longer it will be a viable product) but I can see how the strains of the new landscape are STARTING to tear at it’s seems. If we thought “Reality TV” was bad, Reality Social Media is the Case Cracker.  (more…)


In the middle of ANOTHER writing slump


No real reason for it. I get home, open up my laptop, turn on my gaming system, and Don’t feel like writing. What have I been up to? Gaming, I watched the Entire Run of Black Lightning on the WB. It was a good show, I think they Rushed the Appearances of Thunder and Lightning but if you trying to make this a SUPER HERO Family before you introduce it to the rest of the Arrowverse it kind of makes sense. I’ve been playing lots of games, Call of Duty got me again. I played Infinite Warfare but didn’t get enthralled with it, Then I bought WWII and that was stupid. I hate old school guns, not enough bullets, not as accurate. and yes CoD will probably get me again with Black Ops 4, BUT this is MULTIPLAYER ONLY and it’s a Prequel to blackops 3 so I will probably like it(Since I liked the LAST Black Ops). What we liked about Call of Duty was the pacing and the action, what we could do WITHOUT was all the wall running and shit.

My CURRENt Gaming rotation is Forza Motorsport 7, Star Wars Battlefront 2, and after I do my CoD log in for the night, USUALLY Sea of Thieves. Sea of Thieves (more…)


Merry Christmas


Soooo, it’s been a while. I haven’t dusted off my keyboard to type much over the last few months. Been buys with work, watching football, playing games. I have plenty of games I can review, I may get around to that I just really go from work to gaming and watching sports. Well football, the basketball teams I follow are playing like shit right now. I think for my hometown team they have the talent now they just need the playing time together. For the local team I think they have been rushing way too many changes as of late, fired the coach, let some of the mainstay players leave in free agency, and of course getting hit with the injury bug(which happens to all teams) so this season is apparently already in the tank. Like they have lost so many games I think I’m in a time warp, this team had made the playoffs how many seasons in a row?

Other than that just gaming, I have seen a few movies lately. Yes I watched Justice League, no it wasn’t rant worthy. I could see where ONE director left off and the other had to improve the story. I also see that Director one still has no clue who half of the characters he is using are, which makes for a lousy movie. I am only for directorial vision if the directors vision includes understanding the characters he or she is putting forth. Wonder Woman, awesome the director got it the whole way. Justice League ummmm you can’t just throw people on-screen when you ignore their origin stories and then NOT give us origin stories…. This time though it was at least a cohesive story, even if there were a million plot holes caused by what happened in B v S. Thor was hilarious, saw the Last Jedi too I liked it. I felt  it was an interesting new direction but I can see where people are mildly pissed at it.

Nothing really serious to say, just Merry Christmas, I hope all are enjoying time with their family and friends. Now back to gaming…


I think it’s time we stop saying Spider-man Homecoming flopped


And by we I mean of course the people who near the middle of July after the movie had only been out two weeks tried to pretend that Homecoming would not have legs due to an upcoming crowded field. And yet, just like Guardians Vol. 2 and Wonder Woman, in its second month of Release it has hit 300 million plus. Which would be more than BOTH of the Amazing Spider-man movies that Sony released on its own(neither made more than 265 million) were able to scare up. Now no it has not yet  caught up to the ORIGINAL Spider-man run with Maguire and Raimi but it also cost less than all of them to make.

I get it though, as usual people wanted to run out in front. It premiered better than the last two movies(at 117 million. Which Killed ASM by almost its full opening night, and had ASM2 but 20 million) but as it was a packed month with a few other movies coming up in August people wanted to spell doom and gloom. But this movie was going to make 300 million. and 330 to 350 million isn’t completely out of the realm of possibilities either. Did it slow down, yes is there as much competition now as there was saaaaay at the end of July? No. Quite a few movies have come out, either not done as well as expected or else tailed off just as quickly and when you think of movies you want to see again Spider-man stuck close enough to the source material that I can see folks wanting to check out subtle clues they missed. It’s been over a month, yes my review is way late but to put it simply, Marvel Studios threw a “fuck Peter Parker, Cause Stan Lee says so” in there. It was so meta and awesome, because honestly though he is there most famous character, he is also their most famously FUCKED character.  (more…)


Primaldata Casual gamer Revisited


Does Mike Ybarra read my blog? Does he listen to Xbox Nation podcast? Cause out of nowhere the very thing I mentioned that “I don’t have high trophy or gamerscore levels because I play MOSTLY multiplayer, online, and there aren’t too many achievements for that.” Welp hold their beer Xbox is here with the save, we got you playa folks gone respect all them Tea bags you give out in Halo, CoD, and Battlefield. I originally heard about this upcoming change for @_Crapgamer where he discussed a windows central article that mentioned they were looking to augment gamerscore. Specifically that since there are a lot of folks who do esports(as well as stream) certain games all day long, whether it be on contract or because they have fans who watch for certain games(I know there are a few streamers I watch just to see them play certain games Fallout 4, Gears 4, etc).

It’s kind of funny right, “You can’t get a job playing video games” except, you can. You can get a few jobs playing, talking about, and reviewing video games. Youtube Gaming, Twitch, Mixer, and Ustream off the top of my head all services dedicated to the viewing of video games. I am curious though, let’s speculate about exactly HOW they could Augment Gamerscore to include say “Newbs Pwned,” “Melons Popped,” or even “Cheesey Combos Executed” (more…)


It’s April Fools Day


That means 90% of all pregnancy announcements BULLSHIT.

That “oh I always loved you, why didn’t we ever date” message from that got girl/guy will be posted on twitter, instagram, tumblr or facebook with a bunch of crying emojis at your soft, loving, and romantic response as they use you as clickbait.

Somebody is going to die today, but unless you find out tomorrow, that muffuka gone be bumming a smoke off you in the morning.

Trump Didn’t Get impeached

Nobody has incontrovertible proof that Obama was actually born in Kenya

No that is not an ACTUAL picture of Hillary Clinton’s horns

Elvis is still dead

So is Tupac

And David Bowie

No the Aliens are not here to rescue the people who know Klingon, or Wookie, or Huttese.

That magic pill will not make your dick plump up like a ball park frank and become a footlong

It won’t give you double D’s or the fattest ass either

Whatever hot trailer somebody sent you today, it’s a Rick Roll

And yes, today Rick WILL give you up, and will DAMN SURE let you down.

He already deserted you

No your ex really doesn’t want forgiveness

No I am not admitting to a damn thing, I don’t give a fuck if you have me on video.

Munchkins still ain talking to me, but they will happily steal my drink

and fuck up my name

and try to get me to make mean faces

and walk off with my damn phone “yo, get back here”

No your siblings will NOT remember all the dough they borrowed, til later, when they got you, nah really they got you

I swear I bet if we look up most of the honor duels in history they were like in the first week of April, cause I could see back in the day when you COULDN’T easily find out that somebody was yanking your chain that you wanted to stab they ass. Fuck squaring up bitch, I got you 10 paces at dawn Friday. Draw your sword muffuka, for even WASTING whatever time left before I invariably catch the plague I will END YOU, and probably go fuck your wife, again, cause that WASN’T an April Fools. Bitch ass. I don’t even want to answer my phone or text messages today cause I know most of the people I talk to THINK they funny(they not) and gone do the most, making me want to strangle them and waste bail money. Choking them would have been worth it, but bail afterwards nah.

So pay attention to your surroundings, if you see somebody in a clown outfit run. Like nothing good can come out of meeting up with a clown on April Fool’s day, seriously that is like the ultimate “X figured out the exact moment, when They fucked up!!!” like what is the BEST thing that can happen, the clown just wants a goofy ass selfie. The worst that can happen, fam, it’s a clown, on the national holiday of pranks they have been training for this. Stanky cream pies, nut shots, Ink Flowers, whoopie cushions, hand buzzers, and that is just the TIP of the rusty dick you will probably get fucked with. NO CLOWNS, I don’t mind them on a normal day but today you will catch these hands.


Obviously one does not just Dare Arby’s


Dear Arby’s

The Fuck Is THIS! No, no this is a valid question to ask. I mean we ain even gone get to the fact that they have the words NUTRITIONAL and INFORMATION at the bottom of this picture no no, that is to be tabled to a later discussion. I asked, and the Lady behind the counter said, “the sandwich has EVERY MEAT WE SERVE on it.” Not that I was thinking of ordering it, my affairs aren’t in order, and I personally don’t want to die 5 minutes after eating it nor do I feel like eating salad for the next 6 weeks to get all of that meat out of my body. I mean let’s look at this ignorant shit you have:

  1. Pepper Bacon(of course it starts with bacon, all cakes must be iced)
  2. Roast Beef(cause it’s Arby’s it’s their thing)
  3. Cheddar Cheese
  4. Angus Beef(cause they want this to be a good and flavorful death)
  5. Smoked Brisket
  6. Pit Smoked Ham(I think they believe smoke is a food group
  7. Swiss Cheese(technically at this point we are at Dagwood Level)
  8. Roast Turkey(cause yes both Turkey AND BEEF can be roasted
  9. Chicken Tenders(because if the only thing fried/greasy on this sandwich was bacon they FAILED as sandwich creators *shrug*)
  10. A Star Cut Bun(to solidify locking your bowels up)

This sandwich is served with a BACKHAND from your cardiologist. Your nutritionist will judge you for 6 months after eating this sandwich. This Sandwich looks like they were dared to put a Subway footlong on a Kaiser/Burger Roll. This sandwich looks like Punishment for coming in last at the strongman competition, “there is not enough meat in your system, we must add more meat to make your stronger!” This sandwich looks like it comes with a waiver you must sign to guarantee that you were of good health before you ate the sandwich and that you death within a week of consumption is in no way Arby’s fault. (more…)


The first official “shiny head” day of 2017


Eikichi is a dick, yes this is the only way this post can begin. Way back in 07 or 08 when I just got back from Atlanta, pre marital collapse, I returned of course with much shorter hair. When I left in 06 I had past my shoulder locks and when I came back I basically had a low easily maintained fro. The problem with the easily maintained fro was of course it wasn’t my locks, and I didn’t want to go through the relocating process again. So after a good year of letting it grow out, looking scruffy as hell and then trimming it back I had a “fuck it” day.

Now I don’t remember how close to eye patch week “fuck it” day was but I know I grabbed some clippers, went to a mirror and shaved every inch off the top of my head. Now everyone else had a normal reaction: nice cut, you look good, that’s different but no, not Eikichi his ass screams out “Señor Shiny Head”because he’s a 5’8 3/4” DICK and has for the most part screamed it out every mid to late March ever since because that’s about the time of year when I finally shave my head because the weather is warm enough for me to no longer worry about “head colds.”  (more…)